14 Things You Should Be Saying to Your Anxious Friend

So your friend* has Anxiety Disorder (or another mental illness), and you're unsure of how you can help? Step 1 is to make sure that you are being kind and that what you're saying is sending a message of love and support, as opposed to one of criticism and judgement. 

Here are 14 things you should be saying to your friend* and 12 things you definitely should not.


14 Things You Should Be Saying to your friend*

Say these things as often as you possibly can. 

  1. You're doing so well. 
  2. I'm impressed by your strength and determination every single day. 
  3. It's OK to have a bad day. 
  4. Remember this is temporary. 
  5. You're so worthy of love and support. 
  6. I think you're amazing. 
  7. Let yourself have a rest day from time to time. 
  8. It's OK to say "No" to things and put your mental health first. 
  9. You deal with so much each day! No wonder you're tired...
  10. I'd do anything for you. 
  11. You are the BEES KNEES and you're such a kind and gentle soul. 
  12. Let's celebrate all the things we've achieved today!
  13. Stop being so hard on yourself. I think you are wonderful. 
  14. I love you. 

12 Things You Shouldn't EVER Say to your friend*

  1. Why can't you do the things other people can?
  2. You're a failure. 
  3. You're not worthy of love and/or support. 
  4. You haven't done anything ALL DAY. 
  5. You're so lazy. 
  6. You're stupid. 
  7. You MUST help everyone you can, to make up for being such a shit example of a person. 
  8. You'll never get out of the hole you're in right now. 
  9. You deserve to be sad forever. 
  10. Remember that time you really embarrassed yourself? 
  11. Nobody likes you. 
  12. Let's go over every single thing you couldn't do today! 



"I'd never say those things to my friend. I'm not a monster!"


Well, no. You're not a monster. I'm sure you wouldn't say those things to your friend*. 

But I think that maybe - just maybe - you might have been saying those things to someone. And I think that someone might be you. 

What I'd really like you to think about is why it's OK for you to talk to yourself like that. Because it isn't. 

You should be just as kind to yourself; as you would be to anyone else. 

I hope that you can find it in your heart to read those 2 lists again. Only this time, instead of thinking about a friend, I'd like you to be thinking about yourself.