AD| This post is sponsored by Loop, who kindly gifted me a set of their ear plugs in order to see how they would impact me leaving the house. I’ve been trialling them for a few weeks at the point of writing this post and am more than happy to recommend this product, so I have featured them in this post.
Loop have not edited this post or its contents – all opinions and recommendations are my own.
Leaving the House with Agoraphobia
I’ve struggled with Agoraphobia in one way or another since my abusive relationship ended in 2016. While it started as a fear of running into my abuser in public, it gradually developed into a much more general fear of public places and, during the pandemic, escalated into a battle that left me locked in my house (or even room) for weeks at a time being unable to leave.
I am lucky to have access to the support network that I do. Especially online. There are many misconceptions about Agoraphobia and some people have to navigate this long, hard and complicated journey without the fantastic people who I am surrounded with. In that way, I am blessed.
Agoraphobia, however, is not a blessing at all.
Throughout 2021 I had to fight hard to leave the house. I talk more about my battle with these demons in Living with Agoraphobia.
In this article, I’d like to talk about some of the things I take with me when I leave the house that make it a little bit easier for me to. None of the items in this list are a quick fix or miracle cure. Each item gives me a marginal advantage in my fight against Agoraphobia.
I hope that something in this post helps you. Sending solidarity and love. You’ve got this!
8 Things I take with me when I leave the house: Agoraphobia Edition
Here are 8 of the techniques and items I take with me when I leave the house to make my life with agoraphobia that little bit easier.
- Going outside with a buddy
- Loop Ear plugs
- My phone & Battery pack
- Noise cancelling headphones
- In case of emergency medication
- Fidget accessories
- The car
- Coping techniques
Going outside with a buddy
Having a trusted person with me when I leave the house can make a huge difference to whether or not I feel safe. Most days, leaving the house of my own accord still isn’t an option for me and, when my agoraphobia was at its worst, it was out of the question. Having a buddy with me can change that.
A buddy can help me in many ways. I’ve often relied on my buddy to navigate situations when sensory overwhelm gets the better of me. It means knowing that I am still safe and moving in the right direction, despite the fact that my energy and attention is going on coping with noise levels or crowds. There’s also an element of “safety in numbers” that comes to play and allows me to feel that there is a person there to witness or intervene in any situations where I feel unsafe.
Loop Ear plugs
This is fairly new to me; I’ve had my Loop ear plugs for just over a month now and they’ve been a revelation!
If you have PTSD and one of the things that impacts your ability to easily get around is sensitivity to noise then you need to consider some ear plugs. I used to rely completely on my noise cancelling headphones but these ear plugs have made a HUGE difference to me.
The ones I chose are the “experience” ear plugs in gold, which soften the noise but don’t completely block it out – exactly what I needed. When wearing them, I can still hear everything that’s going on around me but they definitely take the edge off. I feel noticeably less jumpy and tense while wearing them. Plus they take up such a small amount of space.
The ear plugs come with a handy carry case, which easily slips into a bag and keeps your ear plugs clean, protected and together. They also come with inserts in a range of textures and sizes, which means that you can customise the fit of your ear plugs for maximum comfort.
I’m hoping to write a full review of Loop ear plugs in the future, including a guide on how to use them and care for them. Stay tuned for that!
If you’d like to grab your own pair of noise cancelling ear plugs for agoraphobia, use my discount code LOOPXANNELI for 15% off on their website.
My phone and battery pack
Obviously it’s harder to forget your phone these days, as we’ve become so accustomed to having them with us, but having my phone with me makes me feel safer when out and about. I like the comfort of knowing I can contact someone if I need to, that I have my audiobooks available at a moment’s notice and that I can fall back on Google Maps if I get lost.
If my phone is low on battery then a charged up battery pack makes a huge difference. It can actually be the difference between being able to stay out and about or having to urgently go back home.
Noise cancelling headphones
Until the kind folk at Loop sent me their awesome ear plugs, I relied solely on my headphones to help me manage noise levels while out and about with agoraphobia. They have been very handy and I still use them for listening to podcasts and audiobooks while I’m out and need to stay distracted and calm.
Some of the drawbacks of having my headphones on have actually been helped by having the option of ear plugs instead:
- Headphones can be a barrier when it comes to speaking to people while out and about (sometimes this is a pro, but it can also be a con)
- My noise cancelling headphones are bulky and I don’t always have a bag big enough to hold them. The Loop ear plugs are small and discreet.
- The noise cancelling headphones aren’t as effective as the ear plugs when used without sounds being played and they are too effective when I play sounds to drown out ambient noise, meaning that I miss sounds I might want to hear.
Nevertheless, my headphones are still very useful for listening to music, podcasts and audiobooks while I’m out and they provide me with a fantastic distraction from the fact that I’m not at home. It just gives me that little bit of control over my environment, which is a big part of agoraphobia.
ICE medication
If you have any kind of medication, prescription or not, that you use to calm you in case of emergency, I wholeheartedly recommend that you take it with you when you leave the house with agoraphobia. For me, this medication is Propranolol, which is a beta blocker prescribed for anxiety. The medication doesn’t make it easier to leave the house but it allows me to manage the symptoms of panic attacks when going home isn’t an option.
Finding yourself needing medication and not having it to hand can be a truly horrible experience so, if you’re leaving the house for an extended period of time and don’t know when you’ll be back, it might also be worth taking your next dose of any regular medication you take with you when you leave the house. Removing every small fear and barrier to leaving the house is a good way to make sure that you get to make the most of it if and when your agoraphobia allows.
Fidget Accessories
Fidget accessories are sometimes called “stims” and are known ways of coping with multiple forms of sensory overwhelm that can lead to agoraphobia, including PTSD. These come in a variety of forms including items like fidget spinners, stress balls, reusable popping bubbles, fidget cubes and jewellery designed for fidgeting like anxiety rings or bracelets.
I first started using fidget accessories as a way to cope with the prospect of attending my smear test, after a friend suggested it might be a good way to stay grounded during the appointment. I took a bracelet to fidget with during the appointment and, although it wasn’t one designed for the purpose of fidgeting, it opened my eyes to the usefulness of these accessories.
The car
I don’t drive but my partner does and the car feels in many ways like an extension of my home and part of my safe space. Parking the car close to where we’re walking the dog, for example, allows me to feel as if I can easily get back to a place that feels like home if I need to. There are often fields and parks where we can walk quite far with the car still in view, which means I feel considerably safer than I would if it was out of sight. This isn’t the case for our home, which quickly falls out of view after the first corner.
If you drive or have a car in your household, I recommend spending some time and effort making your car feel like an extension of your home. We have cushions and blankets in ours that really help me feel safe and cosy on journeys to and from home.
Coping techniques
I’m not very good at remembering complex coping mechanisms at times when I need them the most, so I have to rely on the very simple ones that feel effective to me personally. For me, the skills I fall back on most are the 5-4-3-2-1 method, talking out loud to myself and tensing each part of my body one at a time working from my toes up to my face.
Saying kind or positive things out loud to myself really does help me but it isn’t always practical out in public (I have been known to pretend to be on the phone so I can talk out loud!!) and tensing my body often requires being able to sit down to do it effectively so the most reliable of the methods is definitely the 5-4-3-2-1 technique.
The 54321 grounding technique is a way of coping with anxiety by grounding yourself in your surroundings. If you have a buddy out and about with you then it’s really useful to make them aware of this technique so they can prompt each stage for you if you need them to, but you absolutely can do it alone.
Take some deep breaths and then acknowledge and notice the following in order:
- 5 things that you can see
- 4 things that you can touch
- 3 things that you can hear
- 2 things that you can smell
- 1 thing that you can taste
If you don’t have any coping techniques, take some time to do some research and you are more than welcome to try out mine. I’d love to know about more of them too – so please get in touch with me on Twitter or leave a comment below.
Please remember that there are no quick fixes in recovery and it isn’t linear, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you go through periods of time where you are unable to leave the house because of your agoraphobia regardless of all these tools. They are there to help you but they aren’t cures.
If you’re struggling to leave the house and would like a change of scenery here are 100 places to go without leaving your home.
A huge thank you to the amazing people at Loop for designing these incredible ear plugs and recognising their potential for disabled people, including those with agoraphobia and PTSD. I’m grateful to companies who recognise the importance of being inclusive and of paying disabled writers for their time.
If you’d like a pair of Loop ear plugs for yourself, you can get them on the Loop website using code LOOPXANNELI for 15% off at checkout.
Take Loop’s handy quiz to figure out which ear plugs would work best for you!
